Responsibility

 Can't say enough that as of lately I've been really learning an important lesson.  

When it comes to taking a prescription it is so important to take it the way that that doctor prescribes that you take it, and not to be missing taking doses that you are supposed to be taking.  

I was lax with it for a long time.   I was under a doctor's order to take my meds in the morning to take 20 milligram.   I didn't do it like I was supposed to.  And I payed for it.  My mental health sucked for a long time.    

Now I have the chance to start again.  I have the chance to turn over a new leaf with a new psychiatrist.   For a long time I was prideful and wanting to do my own thing and it really kicked me in the butt. I am so determined not to blow this.  

I have come to a realization that I need to tell my psychiatrist the truth about what is going on in my life.  There are people out there that are going to buy into stigma, they are going to act like mental health issues can't be talked about in family setting or that they need to be swept under the rug.  But it does need to be talked about.  It needs to come out in the open.  If someone is taking meds for a mental health condition, accountability is so important and I have realized this through my own experiences.  There are times when I needed to be there for friends and be a stable support but I was not able to because I was buying into my ego and I was too influenced by the opinions of other people instead of listening to the one opinion that matters the most and that's Gods.  

It took the hard experiences to learn that lesson first hand and to realize that I needed to stop ducking and dodging talking about the serious issues with people.  It's hard sometimes when someone who claims to love you and then to have your best interest is telling you to keep your mouth shut about mental health issues because they are "private".   This is the honest truth about what goes on with a lot of families where mental health issues are going on.  People are afraid.  People don't want to talk about the truth.  People fear rejection and ostracism or losing their nice comfy homes or jobs because of it.  

Folks I've lived rejection ostracism and stereotypes half my life.   Mental health issues need to come to the surface.  They need to be talked about.   The old ways of thinking need to die.  Because not talking about it is going to lead to you losing that person that you claim to love to suicide or they may just decide they don't want any part of your life anymore and put you out as well.  So I need to ask.  Is it worth the cost to tell someone to shut up when they are suffering?  

I don't think so.  

God bless you all.